Deep down, I must like being fat......

because otherwise, WHY would I go and have such a shitty day after I've finally broken through a plateau and lost 10lbs! I mean...what the hell is going through my head?

I knew deep down that going for lunch today wasn't a great idea knowing that the place we were eating was not healthy. Did I not say yesterday that I wasn't going to have the fries? Well, I did! Not alot but I ate them. Then I had a clubhouse....who knew that these damn things start pointing out at 15! That's what I counted but who knows... So I get home, write it in my book and think okay... it's 2pm and I have 4 pts left. WTF! So then I think...Well I have been really good so it won't hurt. IDIOT! You know I think the greasiness of the fries and the who knows of the clubhouse really affected my brain. I was sooooo friggin' hungry all afternoon.

So for accountability reasons...here's what I "think" I ate today!

clubhouse - 15
french fry - small - 6
Pizza - 2 small slices ham/pineapple - 8 (Emma's leftover)
yogurt w/granola - 5
special k w/1%milk - 6?
fat free fudgesicle - 2

total = 42
flex used = 17

Please...if I have made an error in these points...let me know so I can adjust my book properly.

I just looked back at yesterday.....I think I'm going to cry :( I broke down while watching my movie and ate tortilla chips (approx 25) with shredded marble cheese melted (1/2c) with a little salsa for dipping (I never use much)

Now normally, I would say "That's it...I Quit!" But, I've had a taste of what my stomach looks like a little smaller. I have to do this! I don't want to go another summer looking like a "tank" in a tank top.

Let me figure out how much flex I've used so far...OMG 33! I normally eat/use half or less than that. (big sigh)

Okay so let's think this thru... I have four more days until Fri WI... I need to try and get 2-3L of water a day in my gullet. Get off my ass and either ride my bike or the dreadmill everyday! Maybe if I keep the next four days a little less than my pts of 25 it will even out? Whatcha think? Or am I a desperate woman?

Well after all this...I DO feel better now that I've written it all out. It sucks but it's done so quit your boo-hooing and fix it for the rest of the week.

Okay....goodnite